I began today with a very heavy heart. My Daddy passed away 11 years ago today at the entirely-too-young age of 48. Eleven years.... How quickly the time goes by, yet how vividly we all remember that awful day, as if it were yesterday... and how piercing the pain and sadness continue to be....
Everything still seems to be divided into "before" and "after" Daddy died. It is amazing to me how much has changed during the "after" in the past 11 years. Wonderful, blessed things have happened, and sad things have happened ~ all of which make me miss him even more as the years go by. Even now, I often wish I could discuss something with him during one of our "talks" that we had so often. Three years after Brad and I married, I still miss that he didn't get to walk me down the aisle at our wedding, and that he never met Brad, and vice-versa. I hurt knowing that my babies will never know him and the amazing man and example that he was....
But God is good. He is a strong tower and a refuge, and He heals hurting hearts. If we turn to Him, he will help us to find the good in the bad.... I may not have my Daddy here, but I have an incredible Mother, who has been both Mother and Father to Keith and me for 11 years now. I may not have had a Daddy to walk me down the aisle, but I have a precious brother who did that honor for me. My babies will never know my Dad ~ who Alli knows as "Onnie" ~ but I had an amazing example in him, and I pray they will know him through me, trying to live his example, and through my/his family. I believe he would be proud of us all, and I know that he watches over us and is with us every day. He would be so proud of my Mom, who still had to raise us without him and continues to guide and advise us both. Now a parent myself, I know the importance of having a mate you trust implicitly; my Dad could not have found a better mate in my Mom, whom he could trust to take care of us, with or without him, and who has done such a wonderful job. He would be so very proud of Keith ~ what an incredible man he has become! I am reminded of my Dad more and more every time I am around him ~ and how precious that is to me!
If you ask Alli today to tell you about her Onnie, she will tell you that he lives in Heaven with God and His son, Jesus. She will tell you that he watches over her and is her special angel. I pray that I do Daddy justice by teaching Alli (and our other children one day) more about her Onnie has the years go by and she gets older and can understand. But I think we are off to a good start. When I pulled up the picture below, Alli's little face filled with a smile as she screamed excitedly, "That's Onnie! That's my Onnie!" How precious, and how bittersweet.... Her Onnie would love her so much ~ does love her so much, I know....
Everything still seems to be divided into "before" and "after" Daddy died. It is amazing to me how much has changed during the "after" in the past 11 years. Wonderful, blessed things have happened, and sad things have happened ~ all of which make me miss him even more as the years go by. Even now, I often wish I could discuss something with him during one of our "talks" that we had so often. Three years after Brad and I married, I still miss that he didn't get to walk me down the aisle at our wedding, and that he never met Brad, and vice-versa. I hurt knowing that my babies will never know him and the amazing man and example that he was....
But God is good. He is a strong tower and a refuge, and He heals hurting hearts. If we turn to Him, he will help us to find the good in the bad.... I may not have my Daddy here, but I have an incredible Mother, who has been both Mother and Father to Keith and me for 11 years now. I may not have had a Daddy to walk me down the aisle, but I have a precious brother who did that honor for me. My babies will never know my Dad ~ who Alli knows as "Onnie" ~ but I had an amazing example in him, and I pray they will know him through me, trying to live his example, and through my/his family. I believe he would be proud of us all, and I know that he watches over us and is with us every day. He would be so proud of my Mom, who still had to raise us without him and continues to guide and advise us both. Now a parent myself, I know the importance of having a mate you trust implicitly; my Dad could not have found a better mate in my Mom, whom he could trust to take care of us, with or without him, and who has done such a wonderful job. He would be so very proud of Keith ~ what an incredible man he has become! I am reminded of my Dad more and more every time I am around him ~ and how precious that is to me!
If you ask Alli today to tell you about her Onnie, she will tell you that he lives in Heaven with God and His son, Jesus. She will tell you that he watches over her and is her special angel. I pray that I do Daddy justice by teaching Alli (and our other children one day) more about her Onnie has the years go by and she gets older and can understand. But I think we are off to a good start. When I pulled up the picture below, Alli's little face filled with a smile as she screamed excitedly, "That's Onnie! That's my Onnie!" How precious, and how bittersweet.... Her Onnie would love her so much ~ does love her so much, I know....
3 comments:
Ok.. let me try to write this through tear filled eyes. Knowing what wonderful people you, your mother, and Keith are it gives all of us a very vivid picture of what type of man your father was. You are very blessed to have had such a role model in your daddy. You obviously paid some attention to his parenting because you are a wonderful mother. I know he is very proud of the woman you have become in the last 11 years.
I, too, am writing this through teary eyes. I remeber that night so clearly... the nightmare of you hearing the news, the long drive getting through the night, wishing I could just drive faster to get you home to your mom and Keith. You truly are an incredible woman, and I, too, know he would be proud.
Wow! I just read that and was boo hooing!!! I cannot believe it has been 11 years! My how the time flies!! I saw Keith at a party last spring for John and Erica and I felt as if I was talking to your dad! It is surreal how much he is like him! I know that you treasure that. Next time you are in B'ham please call! I would love to see you! Alli is precious, by the way! I love looking at her pics! She is looking more and more like you every day!! Love you! Hols
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