Hard Life Lessons

Alli has been learning some hard life lessons lately at the very tender age of 3. For one thing, her best friend, Maddox, just moved away to Jackson, Mississippi. She asks constantly to play with him ~ in the beginning, even accusing us of "not letting" her play with him. I think she has finally begun to understand that he lives "a long way away, even if we drive in the car," but still, that is all relative. She told me that she would "be obedient" if I would take her all the way to Jack-ess to see Maddox. She misses Miss Emily and Mr. Stephen, too, wondering why Mr. Stephen thought it was necessary to get a new job in Jack-ess.

Being 11 months older than Maddox, Alli has always seen it has her "duty" to take care of him, and yes, occasionally, to boss him around. :) That duty has now turned into concern. She asks about him all of the time. A couple of weeks ago, we had a conversation that went like this:

Alli: Mommy, do you think Maddox is naked in Jack-ess, Mississippi?

Me: No, baby, I am sure he is wearing clothes. Why do you think he might be naked?
Alli: Well, because he needs someone to take care of him. Do you think Miss Emily is putting clothes on him or is he naked?
Me: I am sure Miss Emily is putting clothes on him. Why are you worried about that?
Alli: Because he needs someone to take care of him. He could come and live with me, in Augusta, Georgia, and my parents could take care of him. Miss Emily and Mr. Stephen could just visit him here, in Augusta, Georgia. (We have talked a lot about "visiting.") I would share my bed with him, and we could snuggle.

Most recently, Alli's missing Maddox has taken the form of an imaginary friend, named very appropriately "Other Maddox." I am not sure that "imaginary friend" is exactly the right term, because Alli doesn't really talk to Other Maddox, and they don't actively play together. More often, she talks about Other Maddox, telling me about what they did together, such as read a book at naptime. Or she will say that Other Maddox is listening while I read a book, but that he doesn't want to sit with us. Other Maddox does have many of the characteristics of Real Maddox, such as blond hair that "sometimes blows in his eyes," big brown eyes, and he likes our dogs. But Alli told me she had prayed to God for Other Maddox, and that unlike the Real Maddox, he will not go away and he will stay here like she tells him to do.

You have no idea how much my heart hurts for my little girl, trying to understand this hard life lesson....

Her other hard life lesson actually has to do with Boots' most recent accomplishment: crawling. Yep, last week, 1 day before she turned 7 months old, Boots began to crawl. We knew it was coming, and in the middle of my clothing show, she just decided to crawl. And of course, she hasn't stopped since then! As any of you with children knows, the leap from a baby who doesn't move when you put her in one spot to a mobile child is a huge life change. You have to think about everything differently. Is your hot coffee completely out of reach? Or is it on the slightly shaky table that the baby might try to pull up on? And anything smaller than the inside of a toilet paper roll is fair game for "eating" and quickly becomes a choking hazard. This is especially true for a 3 year old's toys. All of a sudden, Alli has to watch out for her toys and be careful that Boots doesn't try to eat them. She also has to be careful with her books. Alli is passionate about reading these days, and Boots often heads straight for the 20 or so books that are constantly pulled out on the floor. After getting a bit frustrated with Boots' new accomplishment the other day, Alli wanted to "make a deal" with me. She had come up with a plan:

"Mommy, I love Boots most of the time and on most days. But not all of the time on all of the days. Sometimes, I don't like her. I have an idea. Let's put Boots on a bus and send her to a family that will love her all of the time, okay? Then I will be happy and she will be happy, too!"

We talked about how much we would miss Boots if we sent her away on a bus, and we have come up with some other plans to help keep Boots out of Alli's prized possessions. We have rules about what is shared and what does not have to be shared. Now Alli agrees that she is glad Boots didn't leave on a bus. She really does love her baby sister ~ crawling, and all.

Sorry no pictures were posted this time! I promise to get some up soon. We have cute ones from the Fourth of July and of the girls just playing with each other.